5. A.J. Green takes advantage of having more weapons on offense, recording over 100 catches for 1,500 yards and 20 touchdowns. As an encore he brings peace to the Middle East and cures the common cold.
6. Taylor Mays becomes the league’s most feared hitter. Unfortunately, he’s feared the most by teammates after injuring six Bengals.
7. The Bengals build a new state-of-the-art practice facility, funded solely by the curse jar set up for Mike Zimmer.
8. As a precautionary measure, Brandon Ghee plays the entire 2013 season wrapped in bubble wrap.