The Post Heard ‘Round the World
By nate
Ready…Aim…
I’m usually an optimistic orange Kool-Aid kind of guy. But today’s display of public incompetence in Cincinnati’s 22-14 loss pushed me far right, as militant as my brethren at WhoDey Revolution. And I’m ready for a revolt.
Offensive coordinator Bob Bratkowski should be the first go. Now. Most 13-year-olds playing Madden have enough sense to stick with what works, or at least re-visit it from time-to-time. The Bengals offense had its best drive of the season to open the game, converting four third downs and marching 86 yards for a touchdown. Carson Palmer was efficient and effective in the hurry-up no-huddle scheme, completing five of six passes. Bernard Scott got two carries and went for 22 yards, averaging 11 yards per carry. Then Scott got zero carries the rest of the game.
What. The. French.
It’s so blatantly obvious that Scott deserves more carries (50-percent would probably be ideal) that Al Pacino’s character from Scent of a Woman (who was blind by the way), could watch five minutes of a Bengals game and recognize this.
Furthermore, the hurry-up element of the offense seemed absent after that first drive. The no-huddle continued in some fashion, but everything seemed really slooooooow. The Bengals didn’t score a single point after the second quarter – and those came on a lucky bounce – and endured a brutal string of five straight three and outs.
The lawyers in Bengals fans vs. Bob Bratkowski have more than enough evidence now to convict the man who started the season with a high-powered Batmobile and has since turned it into a station wagon from 1986.
Bratkowski should go now, especially considering the team has an extra day to prepare for the Steelers on Monday Night. With the exception of a few no-huddle and hurry-up drives in Atlanta and New England, the Cincinnati offense has been abysmal. And Bratkowski is ultimately to blame.
Marvin Lewis should get a few more games with someone else calling the plays, but if he continues to struggle, it makes sense to fire him mid-season and get a preview of what a Mike Zimmer team might look like. Lewis has done an admirable job of restoring the Bengals to a fairly stable – albeit mediocre – existence, but his repeated failings as a disciplinarian and a game manager are killing this team. Take yesterday’s challenge for example. Unless there was obvious evidence that Ricky Williams didn’t score the final touchdown, it made no sense to risk a timeout when the ball would have ended up on the inch-line anyway.
It was one more screw-up in a season that has been completely screwed up. So the changes should start now. And while I’m at it, here are a few more thoughts and musings from an infuriated mind. Happy Freakin’ Halloween.
-Did I mention that Bernard Scott should play more? Oh, I have? Repeatedly? Well, let me say it again in case someone that matters is listening. Scott is averaging 5.1 yards per carry this season. He has had five carries in the last three games.
-Cedric Benson is averaging 3.9 yards per carry. The uneducated man will say that Benson is a better fit for the Bengals because he runs North-South. But most of Cincinnati’s zone running plays start East-West before the runner cuts upfield. Scott, who is a step or two faster, is perfect for these plays and all the other ones Cincinnati runs. Benson is a perfect closer. Why isn’t anyone else realizing this?
-Cincinnati has no pass rush. They have the reciprocal of a pass rush. Chad Henne could have read the Sunday paper while crapping yesterday and still could have found Brian Hartline for a completion. With the Bengals rush defense struggling as well, the team should try the 3-4 defense. They’re best hope for pressuring the quarterback would be trying to confuse the opposing offense. Robert Geathers isn’t beating anyone upfield anymore. But he might make a decent 3-4 interior lineman.
-If they stay with the 4-3 – which they shouldn’t, why does no one listen to me? Hello? – Rey Maualuga should play middle backer. Yes, Dhani Jones is the team’s leading tackler and resident braniac as well, but I think Maualuga could get to a few more plays per game. And I think he might energize the team as well. It’s worth a look at this point.
-Jordan Shipley might be the team’s best all-around receiver. True, he doesn’t have a reality show and he might not catch 60-yard bombs, but the kid catches everything that’s even remotely close. Plus, he’s not going to alligator-arm anything over the middle or half-run a route that could cause an interception for the quarterback. The kid fights for the football, like Peter Cetera fights for the Glory of Love. And Shipley can probably play that on guitar. Bonus.
-Finally, as bad as everything has been thus far, Cincinnati fans have to show up and should be positive for next week’s Monday night game. The Bengals rarely end up on national television so the crowd should help the team avoid embarrassment in front of a nationwide audience. A Monday Night win over Pittsburgh will help us stomach the indigestion that has been this season. A loss will only add to the insult. So bring your “A” game next Monday.
But first, let’s start a revolution. Someone go get Bob Bratkowski’s playbook.