Joe Burrow's powers of manifestation worked on my plea for Cody Ford's release

The Cincinnati Bengals are getting a little frisky! Or at least that's how I read their utterly relieving decision to release Cody Ford on Monday.

You know, at a certain point, a man just feels the urge to run sprints around his living room, beat his chest, dart outdoors, and shout from the rooftops, "I AM SUPERIOR!!!!" Because it's getting categorically ridiculous and fringes on sickening just how thorough my ball knowledge about the Bengals is.

For you see, just this morning I demanded the Bengals release Ford and hapless 2025 fifth-round pick Jalen Rivers. These are blindingly obvious moves prior iterations of Cincinnati's brain trust wouldn't make.

Joe Burrow just recently spoke out about wanting to manifest a Super Bowl this year. I took that vibe and ran with it for my piece on Ford and Rivers.

As reported by NFL Media's Mike Garafolo, my manifestation is now reality. And to be clear: This isn't about bashing Ford or Rivers. It's about wanting what's best for the 2026 Cincinnati Bengals. It's about assembling the best team possible. Nothing personal. Any of that is just for entertainment value. So don't get it twisted.

Ford falls by the wayside as Bengals get semi-serious about swing tackle

To be clear, I'm not victory lapping IRL, nor do I believe I'm superior to any next human. Unless we're talking about the ability to write sports and cover the Bengals.

I am victory-lapping via digital transcription, because just look at the content pipeline from Stripe Hype on this here morning. You tell me if we're the best Bengals blog on the Internet. And if we're not, please explain how or why that isn't the case.

My colleague Glenn Adams suggested Cam Robinson as a potential swing tackle candidate to acquire in advance of Ford's release. I wouldn't hate it. For an OT3, that's fine.

Robinson may be the Kirk Cousins of offensive tackles — and that's actually an insult to Captain Kirk's ability to get the bag and at least play somewhat well — but he's better than Cody Ford. Or Jalen Rivers.

Really, a lot of guys are better than that duo. In my final 53-man roster prediction that also dropped today (maybe I'll do a bonus round the day before cuts, we'll see), Javon Foster is the last man standing by default.

At least Foster was a fourth-round pick in 2024. Anyone with eyeballs and an ounce of understanding about football knows Ford hasn't been able to hack it at the NFL level for many years. Rivers was so bad at right guard last year and the current training camp that Zac Taylor had to Hail Mary him out to left tackle just to salvage something.

My thinking is, by freeing up $1.3 million in cap space upon Ford's release, the Bengals will look outside the building via free agency, trade, or another team's roster cut for their new swing tackle.

Or at least I freaking hope so. MANIFESTING AGAIN!!

Going to self-cite myself from my initial story about Rivers' move out to tackle to underscore to why it's inexcusable not to give Burrow a better insurance policy behind Orlando Brown Jr. and Amarius Mims:

"Duke Tobin, can we just sign or trade for a semi-serious swing tackle? Please? I get wanting to develop your own players. I really do. But now is not the time to mess around. This offseason was about going all-in for a Super Bowl. I'm not keen to possibly repeat the history of, like, Jackson Carman, Isaiah Prince, and Hakeem Adeniji types starting at offensive tackle deep into playoff runs. Let's STOP with that, shall we?"

Again, sickening how much I know ball, right? Y'all need to help me manifest yet another splashy transaction.

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