Dan Orlovsky infuriates Bengals fans with 4-word Joe Burrow ultimatum

The possibility of the Cincinnati Bengals trading Joe Burrow seems so remote nowadays after their unprecedentedly aggressive offseason. Had the front office not gone so hard to acquire Dexter Lawrence and a massive infusion of defensive talent, perhaps Burrow himself would've demanded to move.

But then again, Burrow revived the Bengals franchise at a time when they were a laughingstock. He suffered an obliterated knee as a rookie, yet still led Cincinnati to a Super Bowl LVI berth the very next year.

So why does ESPN blowhard Dan Orlovsky still suggest Burrow is giving the Bengals an ultimatum? Is it just to troll the fanbase? If that was the objective, well Dan-O, consider that mission accomplished!

Orlovsky's Burrow bit is getting stale well in advance of Week 1

It's one thing to be a contrarian and actually make a semi-credible argument. In this "EMBRACE DEBATE" ESPN era that was already stale, like, years ago, Dan Orlovsky is more a symptom of a lowest common denominator system than a conscious catalyst.

Or maybe Dan-O is sharper than I give him credit for. Is he really so dense that light bends around him any time he opens his mouth to speak about Joe Burrow or the Bengals?

I'm not so sure giving him the benefit of the doubt is a compliment. Anyway, when Burrow's viral comments about wanting to win a Super Bowl this year made the rounds, Orlovsky responded in turn:

To be perfectly honest, my own analysis of Burrow's quote, reading between the lines, was that he was happy with the front office bringing in more talent to the roster than usual, but that they shouldn't be done. If you really wanted to tin-foil hat this, you could argue that Burrow was sending a subtle shot at Duke Tobin and Co. for doing nothing after they restructured Joe Shiesty's contract.

This is the problem with modern sports debate and big four-letter network type personalities. Orlovsky could've explained himself more. Instead, he went for the cheap, vague implication that Burrow was giving the Bengals an ultimatum at the press conference podium.

Oh wait. I'm getting word that Dan did further explain himself. Spoiler alert: It didn't help.

"Reality in the league. Org is absolutely all in. If they don’t make playoffs that’s 4 straight seasons, if that happens in that league there are big big changes. For all the bengals fans I’ve said bengals win division and go 13-4 so..."

If there's gonna be a fall guy, it's Zac Taylor. You don't think the Bengals wouldn't get head coaching candidates falling all over themselves to coach Burrow. And you contradicted yourself! You said if they don't make the playoffs, then proceeded to say they'll go 13-4!

Not that the self-contradiction is a surprise considering the source.

I mean we're talking about the same guy who, back in late April, contended that the Bengals had a great offseason, but was adamant that Joe Burrow was under immense pressure because of it.

"I think they have improved as much as any football team in the NFL this offseason. [...] This is the most complete football team that Joe Burrow has had since that Super Bowl run...in 2021. We know the offense is going to be great. We know the defense is much improved...A lot of pressure on Joe Burrow to go get it done this year. At least the next two years."

Tell me how that makes sense. If all the pressure is on Burrow, and he's a guy who embraces pressure in a borderline defiant manner, why would a disappointing season trigger a trade request?

Burrow wants the spotlight on him. He wants people talking about the Bengals. He's been consistent in that messaging all offseason and training camp.

Fan reaction to Orlovsky's latest moronic Joe Shiesty take was unkind

Gotta play you out with some of the best fan reactions from Dan Orlovsky's latest nonsense on Joe Burrow on Elon Musk's X/Twitter. I hesitate to give Dan-O any O₂, but whatever. Here we are.

• "You are such a simpleton. A shamelessly dishonest one at that, too." - @andreperotta13
• "lol you used to be good at this." - @gameonjmoney
• "Dan is learning from Shams. Drive angry engagement in a small market by claiming their superstar wants out. Drive engagement in larger markets who want their team to acquire said superstar." - @David_Potteiger
• "Can’t forget when you said Steelers should trade for him." - @LndsPatterson
• "Saying win or I’m out for burrow who’s been to a Super Bowl but trying to hype up Herbert who’s done nothing besides date Madison beer lmao" - @iam_johnw
• "I really mean this. I have zero respect for you. Zero! You're the biggest poser of all time. Your awareness on this is like when you ran out of bounds in your own end zone." - @Bengals_Freak

Heck yeah, Who Dey Nation, let the hate flow through you — and thank you for the absolute gold in the replies!

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